Tammy: "At first I wasn't sure how to tell my kids about my cancer.
It's not an easy thing to bring up.
But I realized that it's an important conversation ... even with my youngest girl.
What helped me was getting ready ahead of time.
I wrote down what I wanted to say ... and talked about it with my husband.
He was with me when we talked to the girls.
Our girls are pretty far apart in age ...
and they have very different personalities ... how they respond ...
how they show their feelings.
So we decided to have separate talks.
Most of all, I tried to be honest with them.
I called it 'cancer' instead of saying 'I'm sick.' We didn't want my youngest girl, Anna, to think that 'getting sick' means having cancer.
With Anna, I also explained that cancer isn't something you catch ... from others.
And I reassured both of them that it wasn't caused by anything they did ... or said.
It's easy for children to blame themselves.
I kept the talks short ... and tried to explain things in ways they could understand.
My older daughter, Claire, needed some time ... but she eventually wanted to know more.
We talked about the type of cancer I have ... and my treatment.
I asked the social worker at the clinic for some information she could relate to.
With some of the tougher questions, I just tried to be as honest as I could.
I told her I was in great hands with my medical team ...
that they knew all the best things for me.
I know that if things change down the road, the conversation with my girls will also change.
But today, I'm hopeful ... and I want them to be hopeful too.
After those first talks, it's been an ongoing conversation.
And even though sometimes it's uncomfortable at first ...
we always feel better afterwards.
And they know they can come to me with any worries ... or questions they have.
I'm glad I talked to both of them when I did.
There's a lot about my cancer that I wish were different ...
but getting closer to my family ... that's been a real gift."
